It's Not All Butterflies and Roses
From a childhood fantasy of joining the police to becoming one of the youngest detectives in South Australia's history, the path of Matt Thomson's career was strewn with awards, commendations, and arrests. Fast-tracked into the CIB after taking down an armed gunman, Matt worked as a drug squad detective and undercover operative, before making the unprecedented move into child protection, where he dedicated himself to pursuing the most violent abusers and paedophiles. Life was a never-ending highlight reel of scenes straight from the movies. But living out your dreams is not all butterflies and rainbows, and the dark culture of toxic masculinity that pervades the police quickly polluted the innocence of those dreams, like ink through water. In an environment where vulnerability is a sign of weakness, daily confrontations with the deepest depravities of humanity meant that the trauma became buried, and the glittering childhood dream twisted towards any form of escapism that could be found in the murky world of drug abuse, risky sex, excessive violence, and self-harm. Using his own experiences to investigate and explore the true culture of the police, the false beliefs that inform that culture, and the resulting, inevitable betrayal of the officers it should be protecting, It's Not All Butterflies and Rainbows uncovers a distinct cycle of toxic masculinity within the police that leads to depersonalisation, destruction, despair, and ultimately, to suicide.The need to break the cycle, by addressing the complex, repeated trauma that police officers are exposed to, in order to safeguard the wellbeing of individual officers, the organisation they work for, and the communities they serve, is the message at the heart of this thoughtful, moving, and starkly honest portrayal of life behind the blue wall of silence.